@ShakesREMIX: My surname: 'Ever.' My given forename: 'Superior'. Similar to a torn talofibular ligament, I am not one to be trifled with.
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@Underchilde: When couples tell me they're taking their relationship to the next level, I just assume they’re gonna start throwing cutlery at each other.
@fro_vo: Me: my fitbit broke Sales Guy: how Me: i put it on my dog's tail and asked him who's a good boy Sales Guy: if i give you a new one can i see