@missmayn: My therapist asked me to list my good qualities:nnNice to everyone's facenUsually wear deodorantnThin cheese slicernnThat took four hours.
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@Underchilde: Sometimes I put a “for sale” sign in my neighbor’s yard and pray the power of suggestion works.
@ClickBaite: [CAVE] BABY DRAGON: Dad, I hate trolls! They are disgusting, evil creatures! DAD DRAGON: Just push them aside and eat your vegetables son.
@Bob_Janke: If you spend "up to $9000" on my funeral it better be on some kind of mechanism that makes me sit up in the casket when people walk by.