@TheCatWhisprer: My toddler just threw her teddy bear out of her crib like she works for United Airlines.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@sucittaM: When I see people running to catch the elevator I'm on I yell "HURRY! YOU GOTTA SMELL THIS!".
@shutupmikeginn: The pigeons behind my apartment are fighting for claim to half a rain soaked hotdog. Fighting me.