@pseudofauxme: My tombstone will just say "Deactivated." I want people to be afraid that I could come back.
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@Mike_Bianchi: Gurl are you Quantum Mechanics 'cause you got 10 different interpretations of everything, none of which fully corresponds with reality.
@Reverend_Scott: [Shop class] Satan: Whatcha makin'? God: Trust. Man can use it to form lasting bonds and friendships. What you making? Satan: A bong.
@ArfMeasures: INTERVIEWER: When did u last work? ME [shrugs] Months ago INTERVIEWER: That's a long time not to be employed ME: Oh no I'm still employed
@SirFlushaLot: I was kicked out of mime school once. I hadn't put the safety lock on and my finger guns went off. The whole class took cover in their boxes