@XLCadillac: My two levels of drunk are 1) dancing with fat chicks at the club 2) smashing my neighbor's window thinking I locked myself out of my house.
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@LurkAtHomeMom: If anyone has a solid 3 hours on their hands, my 6 year old has a story about Pikachu he'll tell to anyone who is willing to listen.
@BobTheSuit: Causes of childhood anxiety: 4% Bullying 9% Inability to puncture a Capri Sun pouch 87% Musical Chairs
@dave_cactus: [at my dad's funeral after he drowns] ME: *places a wreath made of a life preserver on the coffin* It's what he would have wanted...