@mjm866: My two year old just learned to say shut up. Coincidentally I just lost all guilt about clothes lining a toddler.
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@Ilovelamp1979: One of the worst things about tweeting while driving is all of the people that seem to appear out of nowhere on the sidewalk.
@man_in_radiator: My neighbor upstairs bought a new treadmill and I accidentally just shot five holes in my ceiling.
@Jackson5toLife: Why roboticize vacuuming? It's all instant gratification. It's the crack of cleaning.