@robdelaney: My uncle was found dead in his office last night by cleaning staff. I'm glad because he wore Crocs to my wedding in 2006.
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@ChaseMit: I think police forgot which organized group of white dudes with shaved heads they are.
@omerwahaj: Year 2142: Meat eaters have died out. Vegans survive. 2143: Everyone is dead b/c the vegans couldn't tell anyone else that they were vegan.
@markydoodoo: Ever say hi to someone and immediately regret it because now you know you have to say hi to them forever?