@jazmasta: My walk of shame is every time I leave a girl's house after watching "How I Met Your Mother" with her.
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@GaryJanetti: Thinking of adopting a child. What color should I get? Keep in mind my walls are eggshell and cinnamon.
@heatherlou_: Google just alerted me to light traffic in my area which is odd because I'm in the bathtub.
@goodbeanjokes: Son: why is my sisters name rose? Dad: because your mother loves roses Son: what about me? Dad: it’s a long story, Bush’s Country Style Baked Beans