@LoveNLunchmeat: My wedding vows were until death do us part. Yet nowhere did they specify cause of death...
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@Wuttercuerk: I wear Lacoste shirts with the little crocodile on them because when shit goes down I want crocodiles to know that I'm on their side.
@thatdutchperson: [11am] Me: oh look, it's sunny out. Me: I should go running. Me: or swimming! Me: these Doritos are delicious.
@perfect_boxx: Women who want to renew your wedding vows.... Why not renew the bachelorette party? You'd probably have more fun.