@OhNoSheTwitnt: My white cat has been beating up my black cat a lot lately so I guess he's been reading the news and knows he won't get punished for it.
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@ceejoyner: If you don't like your son, grab a football and tell him to go long. Never throw it. He's gone now.
@lazerdoov: Dr. says I have an enlarged heart thanks doc I already know I'm super nice just trying to figure out why I can't breathe when I eat chips
@Steelers1972: Cop ~ Do you know how fast you were going sir ? Me ~ Uhhh .... Roughly about the same as you Cop ~ Get out