@Sassafrantz: My whole life has felt like one big hammock and everybody is watching me try to get out of it.
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@sarousti: She uses her boyfriends toothbrush without his knowledge and wears his underwear every day....I eat a dog biscuit ONCE and I'M the weirdo???
@SequelsWeWant: Honey I Shrunk the Kids IV: They shrink everyone on earth on purpose The planet will never run out of resources Everyone is eaten by ants
@WhiskeySoured: Are these the Americans? No. Are these the Americans? No. Are these the Americans? No. - watching the Olympics with my wife
@yogaknifefight: Oh panic attacks,I thought you said pancake attacks because I have those all the time.