@DaHess1: My wife and I do this cute thing where she sends me pics of kitchen towels she can't decide on buying and I google my life expectancy.
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@SuperRandomish: Drinking wheatgrass juice is a great way to know what being a lawnmower tastes like.
@odannyboy: DC: Wonder Woman is too complex for a movie. Marvel: We just made $100m on a movie featuring a talking raccoon and a walking tree. In space.
@goldengateblond: I've gained 20lbs since the election. If Trump stays in office much longer I'll have to chain myself to a girl in a gold bikini.