@TheBoydP: My wife asked me if I was going to take a shower before we go to some friend's house for the evening like she didn't see me get in the pool.
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@davidkenny100: It's impossible to be a parent and stay on twitter so I'm afraid it's time to say goodbye. So this is your uncle, you live with him now.
@Tmoney68: Not saying I'm lazy, but if we had a motion detector alarm in our house it wouldn't have gone off all day yesterday, even though I was home.