@ericsshadow: My wife googled "when is it safe to leave a child at home alone" and now she won't let me stay home alone.
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@StansaidAirport: I live in constant fear that someone will abduct my mother in law at 35 Ash Street, London, Flat 2, door is sticky buzz Carol to let you in.
@SaddestFinger: My grandfather told me that during the war he was exposed to irritants like pepper spray and mustard gas. Now he's a seasoned vet.
@RodneyH42: A study shows that 50% of adults would fail an 8th grade math exam The other 40% of us would rock that shit