@ericsshadow: My wife & I went to a costume party as each other. She walked around pointing at things, asking how much they cost. I showed up 2 hrs late.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Just_Lee_: It's pretty neat how owning a pool gives me an excuse to own every chemical needed to make a body completely disappear.
@jumpdashark: My friend called me from a private number last night so I just returned the favor by knocking on his door with a ski mask on.
@KalvinMacleod: [dating game] GIRL: contestant #1 tell me how u would woo me ME: woo like in duck tales woo woo or a different type of woo? G: contestant #2
@Book_Krazy: I don't do Botox anymore cause when I can't make my angry face, people just assume it's ok to talk to me.