@Cheeseboy22: My wife is always like, "You answer the door, I don't even have my bra on!" and for that reason, I have stopped wearing a bra.
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@Skullcat: My autopsy is going to be surprising as hell because I am 100% filled with mashed potatoes
@UncleDuke1969: Government Shutdown: Day 4 3am: Monkey House, National Zoo A door crashes open. A triumphant screech. Ben Stiller escapes into the night.
@sammyrhodes: Every time I lose a sock I like to imagine it went to set one of Dobby's house elf friends free.