@Brianhopecomedy: My wife is going to the hair salon today so for the next few hours I will be practising my reaction.
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@PS_IRuddYou: If the stick figure people started committing more crimes... I could be a legendary sketch artist for the FBI.
@pmclellan: My family doctor says "you really need to lose weight," and my witch doctor says "moh ki kaa raa." I think I'll just moh ki kaa raa tbh.
@cookiesnweed: Get your shit together, people at McDonald's drive thru who sit there all confused like the menu hasn't been the same for the last 50 years