@KentWGraham: My wife is great at multitasking. She can be mad at me for five different things at the same time.
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@AdamBroud: Me, having lobster for dinner: This is delicious LOBSTER: *wiping gravy off chin* Yes it is, thank you for inviting me
@Jake_Vig: ME: I can understand why, it's so silky and luxurious. THEM: Huh? I said I worship Satan. ME: Oh. I thought you said "satin."
@jimmytorosian: *Buys map of world, pins it up on wall* *Throws dart, swears to visit wherever it lands* *Visits the middle of the Atlantic Ocean*
@TheRolo: *Rides unicorn to work* *Gives Bigfoot hi-five* *Chats with mermaids* *Argues with Medusa* *Gets called in to HR* *Fails drug test*