@Blarebare: My wife just said that Twilight is better than The Lost Boys. I don't think there's a jury in the world that would convict me.
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@MommaUnfiltered: I may not know much about a lot of things, but this fact I'm sure of: A smoke detector battery will never go dead during the day.
@thenatewolf: *showing mom how to use her phone* What's the blue button with the bird? THAT BUTTON GIVES YOUR BANK INFO TO TERRORISTS NEVER TOUCH IT!!!!
@SethMacFarlane: I wish I could explain to my cat that when I sneeze it doesn't mean the world is ending.
@bridger_w: If I were a mob boss, I'd ask my henchmen to meet me down by the docks, then surprise them with a day of water skiing