@ericsshadow: My wife ordered a pizza from Papa John's but I saved a step by throwing up before it got here.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@KevinFarzad: A great way to de-stress is to get in a car & drive til ur in a new town & ur name is Geoff. Doesnt matter if ur a boy or girl, ur Geoff now
@Dr_awfulpants: If your boss says "Correct me if I'm wrong but aren't you supposed to be in at 8am?" don't correct them. Its a trap. They hate being wrong.
@MartaEffing: Her: omg, I'm SO happy for you! Me: *shaking head* No, no, no... I said I got 'enraged', today. Not 'engaged'.
@howe007: Women’s magazines: Page 5: accept yourself for who you are Page 8: how to lose 10lbs in 1 week Page 12: best cake recipe