@XplodingUnicorn: My wife said she wanted to do it missionary style, so I forced her to change religions and gave her smallpox.
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@SamPsychMeds: *toddler screaming in car seat* Husband: Sounds like someone needs a nap when we get home. Me: I know. Totally. Wake me up around 4?
@robfee: If you have twins name them Adam & Steve so when someone says "Uh, it's Adam & Eve" you can be like "OH REALLY?" and have the boys attack!!