@jergarl: My wife says I was wasted last night and honestly I don't think she's buying my story about having to be naked to guard the neighbors porch.
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@Storminika: Hey Dog Walkers, technically, that dog can walk on its own. What it can't do is pick up it's own poop. You're just a poop collector.
@JusticeBeever: Just shaved my beard and I feel kinda naked without it. I'm also not wearing any pants but I'm pretty sure its the beard thing.
@SortaBad: All of my tattoos mean something. For example, the Chumbawamba lyrics on my rib cage mean I don't drink tequila anymore.