@ericsshadow: My wife spent two weeks deciding what color to paint the bathroom. I got a cat on my 9th birthday and named it Cat.
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@markedly: Things Ted Cruz and I have in common: 1. Love butter 2. Shy eyes 3. Resurrected from the grave during satanic bloodmoon ritual 4. Brown hair
@slimmy_shady: 1) "Obamas spying on you."2) "Eh. Cost of being free!"1) "Obama wants to give you healthcare."2) "WHO THE HELL DOES HE THINK HE IS?"
@rickygervais: Jesus died for our sins. But then he came back to life. Pretty sure that breaks the deal.