@omgthatspunny: My wife tried to apply at the post office but they wouldn't letter. They said only mails work here.
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@VerifiedJayy: My son: do kids that get bullied go to college? Me: no they go to the police academy
@shariv67: Parents tell you their baby's weight because they have no other information. They can't say "Meet Jim, a free spirit who's into yodeling."
@EliBraden: No one shot Rick Ross - when you're that big you're BOUND to be hit by a random stray bullet now and then
@KingRainhead: i dont care if people dislike me, but if a pet ignores me, i will hit them up nonstop & keep changing my look drastically until they love me