@XplodingUnicorn: My wife was out of town, so I had to run the morning routine by myself today. I learned a lot. For example, apparently I have two kids.
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@JayCee302: Me: "I really like this car" Salesman: "Yeah and it also has a latch in case someone gets stuck in the trunk!" Me: "Eh, what else ya got?"
@Jake_Vig: With virtually no power, there still comes a surprisingly large amount of responsibility.
@big_1_Otis: I like to sit on my hands until they go numb so it feels like somebody else is doing my dishes.
@TheDairylandDon: Maybe if you knew Garfield's parents were murdered on a monday by anti lasagna activists you wouldn't be so judgmental.