@amishschool: "My wife worked a 12-hour day and I asked what was for dinner" I explain to the other homeless people.
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@JohnLyonTweets: Me: I like how you dyed all the meat green for St. Patrick's Day. Chipotle manager: It's St. Patrick's Day?
@LoveNLunchmeat: Are you supposed to wear your Fitbit in the shower? I'm looking to break this thing as quickly as possible and need advice.