@citizenkawala: My wife’s story about her day had 18 sub plots, two false finishes, buried the lead and introduced a new character in the third act.
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@TheRolo: If I check out your blog, what will you do for me? Love me? Ok fine, but you're telling my mom we're going out.
@jonnysun: JOB INTERVIEWER: it says here ur a postmodern deconstructivist…? ME: did ur parents realy name u 'Job'? especialy with a last name like urs?
@behindyourback: *at my funeral* Friend crying over my casket: look they're burying her in her favorite dress Me, still dead: it haaasss pockets