@HallpassCanada: My work has this cute thing they do where if you're really good at your job, they get you to do everyone elses too.
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@Parentpains: Whenever I'm on twitter I always turn my phone upside down to try and collect spare change from your pockets.
@causticbob: If you have a choice between ugly or fat, remember this. You can turn the lights out on ugly, but you can always feel the fat in the dark.
@murrman5: *nervously plays with tie* "I'm sorry. I'm no good during job interviews." That's ok, just let go of my tie and go on your side of the desk.
@longwall26: Just a reminder that your coworkers aren't going to get eaten by bears on their own. You have to make that happen. You have to want it.