@MondayPajamas: My worst fear is seeing one of my tweets marked as "exhibit A"
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@FilthyRichmond: Starbucks should have a separate line for people who don't know what they want or how the world works.
@Nickadoo: I'm less upset with Lance Armstrong lying about taking performance-enchancing drugs than I am at Oprah for lying about retiring.
@wolfpupy: hello secretary? i need you to go to that website where you can combine pokemon and combine mew and squirtle, print it out and bring it here
@KindOfASmartass: Me: My daughters are 15, 13, and 10. Her: Do you want more kids? Me: Hahahahahahahaha Her: Is that a no? Me: *Deep breathe* Hahahahahaha