@ch000ch: need to find a better way to trick my dog into taking his medication bc the last 2 times he tricked me into taking it
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@ashleycrem: I'm getting really irritated. This is the tenth ATM I've been to in the last week that's had "insufficient funds".
@Sickayduh: I'm gonna strap a snowblower on my roof and start driving south. When someone asks me what it is, that's where I'm gonna live.
@TheHyyyype: My wife always tells me not to take things personally, so I hired a guy to do it for me. He already stole a bike.