@ch000ch: need to find a better way to trick my dog into taking his medication bc the last 2 times he tricked me into taking it
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@awesomeseank: My wife has her period so I suggested swimming, beach volleyball and a horseback ride. She told me to piss off. Commercials are misleading.
@Brianhopecomedy: I told my 5 year old that he was allowed to choose 1 item from the grocery store so we're walking home with a cart.
@thtchicmichelle: Sent this guy 27 texts in the last hour and haven't heard back so I guess I should probably drive over to his house and make sure he's okay.
@Tarrigan: Spider van Spider van How do spiders drive a van? 10 on top 10 below Where would you like to go? Get in. Get in the Spider Van.