@WhiskeySoured: Never judge a book by its cover. Besides, you're on Twitter and don't even read books.
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@Hormonella: Facebook is terrific way to connect with classmates who haven't aged as well as you.
@RobDenBleyker: I just hope the government doesn't have my Angry Birds scores. All in all they're pretty embarassing.
@apollilaire: hello id like a reservation for two. also what is yr policy on cats. i wanna bring like seven cats. ive practiced fitting them on one chair
@IamEveryDayPpl: Him: "Are you single?" Me: *flashes back to that time Wil Wheaton RTd me and left me at the top of his TL all night* "It's complicated..."