@Loli_Sug: Never kick a porcupine wearing flip flops. Cause they're obviously on vacation and why ruin their holiday?
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@nbadag: DATE: [whispering in my ear] i've got a secret ME: [also whispering] is it tacos DATE: [giggles] no ME: can it be tacos
@JermHimselfish: The worst thing about wearing a turtleneck is not being able to get up off of your back if you fall over.
@MandaPie1981: Is that a burrito in your pocket or are you happy to see me? I'm cool if it's a burrito.
@_NinJar: Me: Whats the best thing on the menu? Waiter: The cheesebur- Me: WRONG! *points to the picture I drew on it of Ironman fighting Darth Vader*