@Savage_Scavange: Never really had a nickname in my life.. Except maybe that one time a bunch of chumps called me "The defendant" for a full day.
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@mynameisntdave: If you want your dog to take a pill: 1. Get a piece of cheese 2. Eat the cheese for energy 3. Get ready to wrestle your dog
@Ivsy01: Him: (on phone) Why are you single? Me: (watching a movie about a killer tire) I don't know.
@dog_feelings: the human thinks. i won’t get excited. if they say. doubleyouayellkay. instead of. walk. but guess what. i am excited