@clindsaysway: Never tell a woman you're infatuated with her. All she'll hear is "fat".
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@shegotagronk: Don't cry because it's over, smile because you were able to steal 12 of his hoodies.
@kelkulus: I can't tell if Michael Cera is actually an actor, or just an awkward guy who keeps wandering onto film sets and does his best to fit in.
@Vodkantots: If your boyfriend doesn't buy you chocolates today, it's probably because he thinks you're fat.
@WildeThingy: [re-enacting the lift scene from Dirty Dancing] "come to me baby, and jump, and oops... You landed in my mouth again! You silly gummy bear."