@MollySneed: Never tell someone that it would work out if "only they lived closer". Crazy can change zip codes faster than you can change your identity.
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@alispagnola: "What character would I like to see throwing up in a parking lot?" -How I pick my Halloween costume
@jimmyfallon: My cousin told everyone he could do a backflip. We all gathered around him. He said, “I can’t do it if you’re watching.” #MyFamilyIsWeird
@jordan_stratton: I don't know, guys. The whole "play dead when a bear attacks" thing sounds suspiciously like something the bears would come up with...