@cynicanoldicus: Never threaten anyone. It spoils the surprise.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Gre_Gone: (scientists naming weird spiny thing in a bush) Scientist 1: This thing sucks Scientist 2: Yeah! S1: It's hogging all the hedges! S2: Wait.
@trojansauce: [me on my death bed after being trampled at a one direction concert] please tell people it was auto erotic asphyxiation
@kellysdf: I thought I lost my car keys, but the NSA called and said they were in my other pants.