@andylassner: Never trust anyone who says you need to come out of your shell because let's start with the fact that they think you're a turtle
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@sadvil: Mark Zuckerberg running for office is a terr… [Mark appears in window holding transcript of any of my convos with a girl in 2009] …ific idea
@LindaInDisguise: Me: Can I dip my breadstick in your Alfredo sauce? Him: Usually it's me asking you that. 13YO: SHUT UP. STOP IT RIGHT NOW!