@itshotterhere: Never trust someone who says you're more important than cheese. It's an obvious lie.
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@Angibangie: Me: I like a full bodied wine. Date: I'm not that knowledgeable about wine. Me: It's like, when the grapes were really thicc.
@markleggett: I'm using an old Indian trick in order to wake myself up early: Eating several large curries right before bed.
@causticbob: I was feeling very depressed the other week. I went to my psychiatrist and told him I was suicidal. He asked me to pay in advance.
@_SetTheHook_: Remember, ladies, when you're taking those selfies, the camera adds like 10 cats.
@SoFarFetchd: What if the weather talks about us?
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