@VerbsRProudest: Never underestimate mothers. They can turn "mayhem" into "ma'am" with one narrowed glance.
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@foodfacenow: *crashes through ceiling into kitchen* Wife:You were doing karate in the attic again weren't you Me:*panting* No *nunchucks hit me in face*
@shashaintl: I just owned you for three seconds. Possibly five if you're a slow reader. Up to ten if you read this again.
@Michael_Erhart: "Why don't you just tell her how you feel?" "Well, alright." "Girl, I feel with my nerves."