@KatieBurnett: Never understood why ghosts haunt old, dusty houses. If I was a ghost I'd haunt Hawaii or Bali
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@QuietPsycho: Absinthe For when you'd love to wake up in the morning...naked on a raft in your neighbour's pool, but lack the motivation
@Lynseyjo1: To the girl with the nazi swastika avi that just rt'd me...... You just rt'd a Jew!!!! Enjoy your evening shalom
@Contwixt: FUN BIT OF TRIVIA...The hard-working individuals who discover and preserve ancient pastas and breads are called starchaeologists.
@dubstep4dads: Me: sorry I rode a giraffe to your grandmas funeral Friend: what? that's not a giraffe Me: sorry I'm on drugs at your grandmas funeral