@thatcarlygirl: New exercise regimen: I can only sit down when my toddler does. So far I've lost 17,000 pounds.
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@isabelzawtun: My mom: you're an adult and you need to start acting like one! Also my mom: what do you mean you don't want an Easter basket this year
@joshgondelman: I'd have more sympathy for Sony's alleged loss of $200 million if that weren't the cost of like three large popcorns at any movie theater.
@_NinJar: G: Grandma (completely safe watch with grandma) PG: Partial Grandma (slightly awkward) PG13: 13 or more cusses (very awkward) R: NO grandmas
@OhReallyRach: If cupids didnt have wings, theyd just be fat little baby assassins with crossbows.