@RatCasket: NEW META
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@lovexios: I hate when people text 'call me'. I'm going to start calling people, say 'text me' and then hang up.
@UrbanDouchebag: I wonder if flies ever think, "I bet I could get this guy to slap himself in the face." Because they'd be right.
@fuqtarded: On the street or subway you can only imagine what that idiot is thinking. On Twitter, you get to see what that idiot is thinking.
@JohnLyonTweets: I'm sorry I lied, but in my defense, telling the truth would have had consequences and I hate those.