@garrydavenport: Next time my 5 y/o says "Daddy, guess what?", I'm going to refuse to let her continue until I can actually guess, even if it takes 7 years.
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@PaperWash: [walking quickly past the old lady I just held the door open for] this doesn't mean you can order before me
@Travon: I'm opening a restaurant called "It doesn't matter, whatever you want" since every girl alive wants guys to take them there.
@brianbowman73: There's a doctor here to see you. Doctor who? No, I think it's a non time traveling one.