@silent_musings: Next time you see someone you don't like, begin conversation with "I see the assassins have failed."
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Courtniss_: There's a special hole in my backyard for people to hit me in the back of the ankles with a shopping cart.
@shariv67: Tonight I'm going to be naughty and tie my man to the bed. Then I'll make him watch a Golden Girls marathon while I eat the left over pizza.
@murrman5: [determined not to have any awkward silence during date] "so, what's your favorite part of a banana?"
@EJGomez: *slams fists on coffee table* WHAT WAS SCAR FROM LION KINGS NAME BEFORE HE GOT THE SCAR