@kwirkyKerri: Nice cargo shorts. You may want to dial back that awesome a little. Not really sure how much I can take.
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@yonewt: God I'm so stupid I was looking all over for my car keys, turns out they were on my head the entire time.
@Jtweeters: If you love someone, set them free. If they return... something, something, Justin Bieber's a lesbian.
@CackleClub: My right eye wouldn't stop weeping all day until I said BE A MAN YOU FREAK and now it's just drinking beer to hide it's feelings