@nerdfaced: Nice guys don't finish last, fat guys do.
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@samsara668: They say I can take the catheter out next week. And no, I'll never piss on an electric fence again
@oxnuxo: Fire engines are painted red for camouflage, so they can sneak up on fires without being noticed
@chuuew: ME What's a penguins favourite relative? Aunt Arctica! PENGUIN . . ME [makes flies over head motion] PENGUIN I don't know what that means