@SonOfCha: Nice tan. I'm guessing your mother is white & your father's a sweet potato?
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@eye_spyder: You hear about that roman ruler who found the fountain of youth? Emperor constant teen.
@McNarstle: Catch a baby opossum, give it a 12-hr sedative, and hide it in the glove compartment of the car of the person who's dating your ex.
@JasonLastname: Go into a bathroom stall and write: "For A Good Time Call Your Mother. She Misses You & Enjoys Hearing Your Voice."