@jordan_stratton: Nice try, horror movies, but the scariest thing I've ever seen is still a 4-year-old holding a sharpie without the cap.
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@HandyJack420: The Dominos "tracker" says Ashley just left with my pizza so I only have a few minutes to get naked. Just glad it's not Brad... ...again.
@CarpentersCrack: Most guys that think they know everything about women usually lack one thing.... A woman.
@SamuelHLowe: I've always wanted to buy 2 coffees, take them to a crime scene & while handing 1 to the officer in charge ask, "So, what do we have here?"