@rzarosco: Nice try weed people... Are we just supposed to legalize anything that comes from the ground? What's next potatoes?
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@XplodingUnicorn: 3-year-old: I can’t run as fast as everybody else. Me: Why not? 3-year-old: I don’t have enough feet.
@djdarrellripley: Her: I can't cook because, I "believe" I can't cook. And you want to know what makes me believe that? Me: The arrival of the paramedics?
@davepell: 95% of American office workers are watching the World Cup right now. Overall productivity level remains steady.