@MikeEpps___: Niggas Dont even say grace before meals anymore . They just Hold up Their Phones over the Plate , snap a Pic , & Post it on Instagram
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@WilliamAder: Co-worker playfully snapped my suspenders and now everyone in the office knows my safe word.
@BBQJones28: Tomorrow I'm gonna chase someone...like really run after them..screaming and everything.
@AndyAsAdjective: *sips some coffee & interrupts break room conversation* "Technically we're all under the weather today unless you're an astronaut in orbit"
@GodShammGod9: My great grandma started to giggle at a barbecue and when I asked what's funny she said " everyone here is alive because I got laid ".